The massive increase in marriage divorce and increasing in marriage infidelity is a signal of a faulty foundation. It tells us that something is wrong at the inception of the marital journey. This issue is associated to the mindset of the period of dating, time of waiting or the time of courtship. Let shed a little light on courtship matters with the help of the Comforter – Holy Spirit who knows the deeper things of God
The beauty of a Courtship is in the ability to do what is right. The right thing is to be truthful, and sincere in the heart toward the partner. Before this can come to being, there must be an agreement in your heart on what you find about people, with the knowledge of what you look for (this is internal affairs- relationship between you (soul) and your spirit, the product of which is PEACE). The most important question is how do you get the knowledge of what you want or what you are looking for? One should not jump to such relationship unless you know what you want and what motivated your knowledge. Most time what we see happening is soul and body relationship in entering into a courtship; oh I like this kind of lady with this shape to be my spouse or oh I prefer a fat looking man as a spouse. Please, let stop this attitude, it does not profit. You must be able to find the knowledge of wife or the husband that is meant for you, you alone. Though appearance is good so, brothers and sisters should always look good and descent. When talking of ability, it is God that gives power to be rich, and gives the ability, it is this same God that gives the power to find the knowledge of the person to marry. He says ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened. In asking, He says if anyone ask according to His will or abiding in His word, he or she shall receive. One needs to go to Him, receive from His word through prayer and study the scripture in abiding with Him. Having received from Him the knowledge of your spouse, the next stage is to seek or search for him or her.
In seeking, you need to know how to find the true identity of the person you are looking for, don’t be deceived with the appearance but look after the identity of an inward man or woman. The true identity of any man is revealed by his fruits. The person’s fruits are shown in his words or his works. Compare and contrast the knowledge you received with the spoken words of the person because out of the abundant of the heart the month speaks, and also with the kind of works he does. The produce of his hand, what he or she approves and allows is revealed by what he does, beside the kind of occupation he does. If the words of his/her month and the work of his/her righteousness match the knowledge received, then you find the person you are looking for. In some instances when the brother or sister is hiding his or her identity (by pretending in his/ her words and works), you can go further to find out the kind of friends he/ she walks with, the kind of company he/ she keeps, places where he/ she could always be found, to know more about the person. The next stage is knocking, you go back to the Lord for confirmation, having receiving the knowledge from Him initially. Then, if your decision is right with God, you will receive an inner witnessing of Peace of God that surpassing all understanding which will further guide your heart in the next stage of relationship from soul to soul, in asking for marriage, in seeking for marriage (at courtship, a period of re-alignment to be of the same mind), in knocking to enter into marriage union. At marriage, this involves body to body relationship, that is husband to wife relationship, then sex come to being, bodily affection properly set in motion.
Don’t stir up love until it is necessary, wait for a proper time, for love matter is not to love the person today and say tomorrow you love him no more. The love of God, expressed in our Lord Jesus says, those He loves, He loves till the end. You love until death do you part. Nothing could separate love as nothing could separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.
Let every brethren preparing for courtship get a sword in his/ her hand. If you don’t have sell all that you have to buy one. The sword in your hand is the sign of maturity (your occupation), means of identification of a warrior (knowing how to travail in prayers), well grounded in the knowledge of God, for the sword of the spirit is the word of God. Use your time as a purchasing power for the sword by spending a quality time with the word of God to know the truth that set you free against the wales of the enemy (in making a terrible mistake) and time for empowering your hand to become great in your profession. Be creative and diligent in what you do for living. This sword in your hand must be able to secure you a good marriage, a good home that God delights in. This sword in your hand must not leave your hand after marriage. It turns to become your responsibility to grow what you found about your spouse, what you knew about your spouse in order not to be feeble and inactive in your presence. What you initially found about your spouse must be nourished, watered and keep on growing to your taste and happiness. Then, you will have fulfilment and good success in marriage.
Praise God!
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